Many things happen after the result out and knew that I can't go UK. After summaries everything I would say it is a mental torture. And I suffering on it. Maybe from outside I still can laugh and smile happily but inside who knows?

I don't know that is it others people not really understand what happen on me, or I don't understand actually what happen on myself. I feel like everyone not really understand me including my parent. Life should be very clear and simple. Sometime we have hurdle or obstacle in life. But for me like the other way round. Obstacle more then the clear and simple life. Sometime I compare with other friends that have plus minus life same like me. I felt that most of them are more better then me.

Not to complain too much but that is the fact. Because there are many things going on, I really learn how to accept and be patient. In the end I really have some great friends around me. I don't know where is the mistake now that I need to correct so my life can become more better. Can anyone out there tell me? Anything need to improve? Some people said things already happen so just forget it. But for me I'm not seeking a way to turn back the time and correct everything. But what I'm searching is an explaination and solution. I can't just get drunk and go to sleep than the next day forget everything. I need to know what going wrong so it won't happen again. Am I right?